Most of the time, I use this skill when I come across some psychological issues. I fix bugs with it. Very often, after fixing a bug, my mind needs to adjust other programs, to regain stability. It requires time and there are only 24 hours in a day. I try to make the best of it and focus only on important things.
Do you know this feeling, when you feel that something is wrong? You feel some discomfort, but you don't know what causes it. Then you analyze yourself. You think you know what the problem is. You apply your solution. There seems to be an improvement, you think that you've fixed this problem. But after a few days, you're back to the initial state. This wasn't it. And you repeat this cycle over and over again, losing hope that it will ever be better. Do you know what I'm talking about?
I used to do it too. I used to observe my thoughts, read some wise books, analyze, come up with conclusions. Usually wrong conclusions. I used to struggle with my own mind like everybody else. Now I look into my source code. I don't need to rely on the analysis of my behavior. I just see those programs. Maybe "feel" would be a better word. Because it's not visual for me. It's pure abstraction. Something like a dependency graph.
I use it to solve those kinds of issues. I really love it, when I look into my programs, I find the bug, I fix that bug and I can see how my mind instantly begins behaving differently. I feel better and I know, that I've dealt with this problem once and for all.
I use this skill for self-improvement. I don't use it for some stupid whims. I don't do crazy experiments. This is my mind. I try to be as responsible as I can.
I haven't programmed myself to become a millionaire or attract hot chicks. It doesn't work like that.
I haven't try to activate superpowers, reading people's minds, seeing through walls, levitating, increasing my IQ to 1000, or enlarging my penis.
Although I've tried to access my past life memories, or what my soul is doing on other planes of existence once or twice. Just before I went to sleep I gave my mind a command to show me what I do on other planes of existence. That night I had a dream in which I was some kind of a warrior princess in a sci-fi battle scenario. I had all kinds of superpowers and I was leading a squad in a tunnel. It was interesting to feel within myself this feminine gentleness because in this life I'm a bit robotic.
But I have a feeling, that things from other lifetimes or other dimensions wouldn't be very useful for me right now. I also think that past life memories are just a database of information. It's not who I am. It doesn't define me. I think it's much better to have access to my programs because this is what actually defines me.
Somebody might ask "If you're so good at this and you've been doing it for so long, shouldn't you run out of bugs by now?". Well… no. I still have a lot of work to do. There is a huge buggy cluster in my mind. I need to reprogram a big part of my personality, a big part of myself. It's not a single program. It's more like thousands or even millions of interconnected faulty programs. It's a lot of reprogramming to be done. I won't go into more details here. Maybe I'll do a separate post on this in the future. I think I've managed to decode the core structure of this cluster. Basically, it makes it very difficult for me to let go of the need to control everything, and just go with the flow.
No comments:
Post a Comment